crying...

i tired of always smiling...
tired of always having to put on a strong face
tired of always have to think of others before myself

i just want to be like a freaking childish 23 yrs old...
asking for people to give in to me
asking for people to help me cox i freaking walk with a limp
just staying at home rotting instead of working

people always see be as being a strong ger...
in fact i am not that strong
all the burden i am carrying is making me breathless
burden of doing well in school
burden of doing well in work
burden to be able to make everyone happy

actually i feel very imperfect...
walking with a limp
being different from others
i hate when i see people staring at the way i walk
i have to work double hard to make ppl recognize me
people look down at me because of this
i hate when i cant wear heels bcox of this
i hate when i cant swim bcox of thim
i hate when i cant run bcox of this
i hate when i cant cycle bcox of this
i hate my life bcox i cant do everything people can...

i know i have alot people that truely cares about me
that do not even care that i am imperfect
that actually take care of me and love me
i know it and i appreciate it
thanks alots... LUV

but being different
is just so tiring at times
when the burden start to fall
and make me breathless
is times where i feel that i should not even be born
where i will think that the world be better without me
my parents will be more relax with this burden
my friends will feel less relax as do not have to worry for me

everytime when the burden fall
i will always after a while be able to push it back
and carry it for quite awhile more
so lets hope after a good sleep
i will become the strong and cheerful florence again...

piss off...

i hate it when i make mistake in work or whatever thing i suppose to do
duno whether is my good point or bad point...
i will want things that i do to be perfect
i know is quite impossible but i hope to be as perfect as possible
maybe it was bcox i was born imperfect
that why i want to change fate and be able to produce perfect things
when things turn out imperfect
it just sort of remind me how imperfect i am

it gets really tiring trying to make things perfect...
i think is time i try to change this habit
things will never be perfect
so like i never will

P.s: i should also change the habit of trusting ppl too much
should trust no one but myself...

luv

i miss falling in love...
drowned in sweetness...
when will i feel love again??

Short note: happy!! everything settle =) money does drop from the sky =P

tired

is hard to work with you at times
i have to be extra careful ard u
it make me really tired at times...
it maybe me being extra harsh on u or watever
i will try to change...
i hope you do so
if not it will go no where...

hurts...

it hurts when i see my love one hurting
yet
i cant seem to help...

my happiness always come from my love one
so i want all of you all to be happy!!

3 combo attack today
had tackle me down...
you all confine in me in your little secret
i am happy that you all did it
i am willing to help carry any burden for you guys
but
when the only thing i could do is to listen
i feel useless at times...

"i want to be able to hold on to your hand
and lead you away from the darkness and into the light
but i cant seem to find your hand in the dark
all i could do is hug on to you
protecting you from whatever is in the dark
while you find the way to walk into the light"

so lets solve the problem together
and not alone...
i will always be there for you
although i cant do much too

P.s: Gerri i love you... whatever decision you made, i be beside you... watever worries you have i will always be just a phone call away... stay strong... LUV

You know who... please do not made me worry... we will figure a way out... you lead me to the light lots of times and now is my turn to acompany you in the darkness to wait for the light =)

Ming... praying nothing serious will happen...

Let the suay Nov pass by fast...
when dec come let my love ones be happier

lazy mood

is been awhile since i blog...
lots of things to blog
chalet with the crazy ppl
meet up with poly cliques after their exam
usual meet up with my LUV...
but i just feel so lazy =P

life have been good
i am happy as how it is going
but it tend to become kinda of boring...

this is human isnt it??
never contented with life
i wanna be but i just feel something missing
what is it???

suay day

what a suay day at work yesterday was
delivery slam
(honestly think was becox of the haze, cox everyone else delivery very busy too)
2 new rider can freaking lose their way
stupid phone ringing non stop!
have to keep apologizing to customer
*pray pray no delivery complain*
*pretty please*
lucky there is good customer that made my day too

while all this is happening
edward came audit =(
i instantly feel like killing myself
delivery non stop from 10am
he still fail my audit
still kana say by boss...
lucky edward seem like a nice guy
help me push up my result
if not will be a 60%
*really can die instantly*

after all this thought that the end
realise ordering never do
have to go borrow things
hope the things we borrow will last

P.s: I have only 2 hands 1 head
if you trust me, know me well enough
you will have to know i did my best le
*blame me for the outside food and nametab, is my fault*
haix...
appreciate the apologize...
at least made me feel slightly appreciated